Conan the Cimmerian (June ’08) Issue #0
Writer: Timothy Truman
Artist: Tomas Giorello
Colorist: Jose Villarrubia

When you’re looking at a giant wall of comics, picking out your week’s selections, how do you pass up a $.99 issue? It’s like those old 1-800-Collect commercials asking what you can get for a dollar these days, except those were like 10 years ago, and prices are even higher now. So yeah, a comic for less than a buck is hard to pass up. That’s probably why I didn’t pass it up because in all honesty I’ve never really understood the fanship of Conan / have had absolutely interest in him or his stories. So was my dollar with it? Hit the jump to find out.

Yes, it was. See, I’m simple. I don’t drag things out to sucker you. Neither does this comic. It’s beyond simple. It’s really fucking simple, in fact. It’s just Conan kicking the shit out of guys for several pages. I guess it’s interesting. There’s really no plot at all, and the character development is weak. Well, there really is none (besides the fact that you hear Conan is a Cimmerian time and time again). You’ve heard of teaser trailers — this is a teaser issue. It’s great art, though, and a fight scene that made me laugh as some guys totally underestimated Conan (not cliche at all). But yeah, the art rocks, including an especially sweet two page portrait of random Conan-related images. There was one weird thing about the art, though: there are like a billion head-shots.

At times I felt like Conan was trying to get his big break in Hollywood or that the artists got tired so they threw some more face into the picture. It was a little unsettling, but I made it past this obstacle to bust my imagination out . . .

How sweet would it be if Conan O’Brien dressed up like Conan the Barbarian for an episode. He grew a beard once, so why not give this a shot? I’m sure he’d win over many non-viewers, and I’m sure current viewers would be just as entertained. He could even slay something while he’s at it. Maybe like a cardboard figure of a raccoon. It wouldn’t be quite as bloody as this comic, but it would certainly pass FCC filters while quenching my thirst. Just a thought, Conan, if you’re out there reading this.

Oh, and if you want a review, I randomly found this one that pretty much agrees with my sentiment about the overall comic should I review it: http://www.comicsbulletin.com/reviews/121453557399133.htm