Standard Issues thrown together by Wilbur
Filed under: Uncategorized
I may not know anything about who Gambit or Rogue is, but I can figure a few things out on why that whole situation could have been handled a little bit easier if Gambit spent a little less time crime fighting and a little more time researching how to live through sex. To me the situation seems pretty straightforward. Ring up Professor X, he knows a lot of stuff, mostly about science. Being that he’s psychic, he also really knows that Gambit wants to get it on. I don’t need an X Brain to figure that one out. Anyhow, Professor X then gets Beast in charge of some sweet, comfortable, Rogue shaped latex suit. A body condom if you will. Third step is to invest heavily in Vaseline. That stuff is cheap, I’m sure you can find a gallon of it for like 10 bucks. Fourth, get Rogue in that suit, and get that Vaseline on. Now just let nature take it’s course. Sure it’s not quite as intimate as real skin, but there are downsides to being stupid enough to date someone you can’t touch.
Chances are it wont be the greatest thing they have ever experienced, but she really has nothing to compare it to anyway. On second thought maybe Beast should implant some sort of penile authentication for Gambit, but maybe that would be a bit much. Then again, you’ve already taken it quite over the line, might as well keep running.
Also upon thinking of some of those pros and cons, I can add a few of my own.
Pro Additions:
1). MIDF
2). Also chance of her turning into some sort of supermodel during.
3). Same appearance, tons more experience.
Con Additions:
1). Could turn into Andy Rooney at any moment just to watch you slowly curl up and die.
Just saying, the guy took a risky way out.
Well, right, but say you’re not in the Marvel Universe and your girlfriend’s mom just happens to me able to morph. No Beast. No body condoms. Do you do it?
Comment by Dalton 06.12.08 @ 6:14 pmLeave a comment
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